But I waited a few days before I sent him a Poke back.  I didn’t want to seem anxious.  Since he sent me a Poke, I knew that he wasn’t mad at me!  It was Wednesday before I sent him back the Poke!  Then he Poked me back again!  But to be honest with you, I am getting a little tired of these Pokes!  Not really tired, more like frustrated!  While I am very happy he is still Poking me (and that means he is thinking about me and he must like it or he wouldn’t be Poking me) I just want to talk to him!  I know he works all day and is too tired to log on and sit at the computer all night but if he really liked me he would.  So after he sent me another Poke I finally broke down and sent him a message.  Here is what I said…

Me mad? Never. Almost back to back vacations, i am hardly on FB hence the appearance of being absent.   Hopefully I can get another week sometime in early September cuz that is the next available time.
How about you, any holidays?

I was glad he asked me a question it meant he wanted the conversation to keep on going.  So here is what I said…

Well, that’s good! I like your attitude John! I wouldn’t want to piss you off!  
Where are you going in September? I am still looking for work so I guess you can say I am on a temporary holiday until I find something and hopefully soon! I have been off since December and I am very anxious to get back to work! I maybe doing a weekend away thing here and there though. That’s about it until next April when we go to Florida again! That is always something to look forward too!

How was the Big Rideau? I am glad you are not mad!

He never replied back but he sent me a Poke right away.  It almost pissed me off becos it wasn’t much of a conversation.  That’s how I can tell he isn’t really interested in me.  He would of at least answered me back and then say he was going to bed or something.  But he kind of just left me hanging.  And what does all this Poking mean?  Does it mean he is interested in me?  Does it mean he likes me and he likes Poking me?  I don’t get it, I just don’t get it!

All I can say is, I am really glad I didn’t piss him off and that he is still Poking me.  LOL  I just wish he would comment on my Status like he use too.  I was actually wondering today if maybe he blocked my Status’s from appearing on his wall and that is why he doesn’t comment on them anymore.  But I don’t think he did.  I don’t think he would stoop that  low.  I know he enjoyed my Prowlin’ status’s!  LOL  I know he said that he isn’t on FB much but I do know that he checks FB from work every day.  I see he chats sometimes becos it appears on his wall.  I am sure he has no intensions of ever meeting me but like I said, I am just happy he is still Poking me!   

The past two days I have had a nasty migraine.  I woke up with it Wednesday morning.  I just hate migraines!  I hate feeling nauseous and all that will help is just to sleep it off.  The weather has been very hot and humid here and I am sure that is why.  I know a few friends and my mother had a migraine too.  I slept most of the day today and I feel better now.  Not 100% but at least the pain is gone.  I haven’t eaten much in two days but tonight I made a nice salmon dinner for J and I. 

I am really looking forward to this weekend.  Saturday night I am going to a wedding celebration party.  A friend (ex co-worker) daughter got married in Mexico a couple of weeks ago and my friend is throwing a party at a pub for the people who couldn’t make it to the wedding.  A few people from work will be there.  I am really looking forward to seeing them and having fun!  I am wondering if D will show up!  I kind of hope he doesn’t becos all of the old feelings will come back again, as soon as I see him I am sure.  No one has told me he is coming and I haven’t asked becos I do not really want to know.  The party will be fun and I looking forward to it!

So how is everyone doing?  Are you still Blogging?  I know Bobbie is but did you give it up Susan?  And who is it that comes from Mesa, Arizona?  Is that you Tina from Sweet August Dreams?  I read your blog all the time but I lost your password a long time ago!  Do you still Blog?  Please leave a comment and let me know it is you!

Not too much has been going on,  I just want to write about the guy I like on Facebook.  Most of you know about him.  I really think I blew it.  I will try to copy and past our last message to him.  It would be easier to do that rather than to explain…  It all started from here…

I saw your pictures of your sunsets. They are beautiful!!! And I thought I had a good eye! What kind of camera do you use? You should make them into inspirational pictures, I am sure people would buy them! They are that beautiful!

I only wish I was sitting right there beside you, sharing the beauty of it! xo,xo

Thanks Pam….I was using a Nikon Coolpix digital camera 12mp. Very easy to use and loaded with options.
I thought of making some into prints…..the colours are so soothing.

Really, you want to be sitting beside me? Isn’t that romantic?

Sorry, I took so long in replying to you. I was enjoying a nice hot bubble bath. Don’t laugh I really was! lol

Thats funny, I use a Nikon Coolpix digital camera too. My camera is only 4.0 megapixel though. I am hoping to upgrade soon.
Yes you should definately make them into prints and put Inspirational quotes on them. Posters, cards and plaques, I am sure people would buy them!

Yes, I really want to be sitting beside you! And that is definately very romantic! But I guess we wouldn’t really be watching the sunset would we? That is what I have been trying to tell you all along John! Unless you are already taken.

Hey stranger… you have been so quiet lately. No more Poking or commenting on my status’s like you used too. Are you ignoring me? What did I say wrong??? I sure do miss you!

I want you to be honest with me… Are you seeing someone right now? If not, do you think there is a chance that one day we can actually meet? It sure would be nice to meet you one day!

I just realized I think you are on holidays next week. I think that is what you said to me. If so, have a wonderful time!!! I hope you take more great pics and I hope to talk to you when you get back! Enjoy and have one for me!!!

When I said to him…  Well, I guess I know where I stand since you never answered me. Sigh…  He sent me a Poke after that, it was last Sunday night I Poked him back but he has never Poked me back since.

I have been stalking his lady friends too.  I know I am evil!  But it is fun!  LOL  Last time he went away about a month ago he sent me a Cyber Hug and it really made my day!  I sent him one back and thanked him for sending me one!  Well, I noticed on one of his lady friends wall that he sent her a the same Cyber hug!  It crushed me!  It was on the same day too!  Some of his lady friends I can get into their wall becos they don’t have their’s blocked.  He sent her cyber Heart just before he left on this vacation so I am assuming that he is sending them to all of his lady friends.  Accept this time I didn’t get anything from him. 

Since I didn’t hear from him all last week I sent that message to him saying “Hey stranger, you have been so quiet lately…”  I also sent him a Facebook hug.  Just a simple FB Hug.  It wasn’t romantic or anything.  Just a bear holding a heart saying Facebook Hug…  meaning that is all we will ever be is facebook friends.  He never returned a Hug.    And I do believe now he has gone on his holiday.  I saw him on line last night but I think he left today and will probably be back next Sunday. 

I am SOOO upset about this you have no idea!  I have been crying about this!  I know I came on too strong.  I just wish I shut up and didn’t say anything.  It was going so good!  I loved it when he commented on my Prowlin’… status’s.  I know he enjoyed them too!  We had a few good conversations as well and I really enjoyed talking to him.  I really like him!  He is just my type, I love everything about him!  I know he is a really great guy, I know he is!  I know I haven’t met him yet but I can tell a good guy when I see one. 

I think about him all the time, all day long!  I check his FB page 100 times a day just to see his picture and mostly to see if any of his lady friends left a comment or sent him something.   I hate this about myself!  I get hooked on one guy and I am so infactuated by him.  And of course he never returns the feelings.  What is the matter with me?

I know my FB friend, at least I hope we are still friends is not as interested in my as I am in him or he would of answered my message or Poked me or sent me a Cyber Hug.  But he ignored me.  I want to send him a message apologizing but I don’t know if I should.  Should I just let it go and hope I hear from him when he gets back?  I am such an IDIOT!  Why did I say all that too him?  I blew it!  I am afraid he is going to delete me or block me from Status’s.  Although, I don’t think he will go to that extreme becos I think he really does like me.  Is he just ignoring me right now?  What is wrong with me?  What should I do?  What would you guys do?  Any advice would be greatly appreciated!!!

Lets see what is new…  I still haven’t found a job yet and my severance package runs out the end of July and I am really worried!  The temp agencies aren’t even calling me.  I am registered with 2 temp agencies and I called them last week hoping I would get work becos people are going on holidays.  The lady said that the companies aren’t even calling them to replace there employees that are going on holidays.  The companies are just dealing with it.  She said “It is pretty depressing actually!”  No kidding!

I actually do have 2 leads – one is with an energy company.  It is the same thing as I was doing before so I would hope that they look at my resume and see my experience.  I called them today and they are going to be starting interviews this week.  So please keep your fingers crossed for me that I do get a call.  I hate interviews, I can’t believe I have to go through this at my age.  the other lead I have is at a call centre at a good company but that won’t start until late August or early September.  They are setting up a training program.  But it is working shift work, weekends and holidays.  I know I won’t like that but I will have to take it if I get it.  I would prefer the other job, I think.

So as most of you know, I have been having fun “Prowlin” on Facebook!  LOL  I especially want to thank Susan for all of your comments!  They are hilarious!!!  Awhile back, I joined this group on Facebook called Are You Interested.  It is a group for singles but there are some married people on there becos they actually say they are.  I was going through all the pictures and I came across this one guy and I saw him and went “OH!!!  He is cute!”  I read his bio and liked it but I skipped him.  You can either Say Yes, Click on Yes Anonymous or Skip.  Since I was just starting out and being very nervous I skipped him.  I kept thinking about him and I went through them again, found him and clicked on him!  A couple of days later I got a message back from him!  I replied back to his message asking him to add me on Facebook and he did!!!  This was back in March and we have been talking since!  He is really cute and I really like his personality!  And I know he is a good guy!  Infact, I know he is a great guy!  I can just tell!  I really, really like him!  I am crushing on him BIG time!  He is just perfect for me!  He is even exactly my age!  The only problem he lives in Ottawa and I am here in Oakville.  It is a good 5 hour drive!  Why does Ottawa have to be so far away?   

We have been sending each other “Pokes” pretty much every day!  Sometimes even twice a day!  LOL  I did start it but I think he is enjoying it as much as I am!  He has even sent me a couple of Cyber hugs!  Which totally surprised me, even shocked me!  He really makes my day and I told him so!  But I get the feeling that he isn’t as interested in me as I am in him.  becos I haven’t heard from him all weekend.  He sent me a Poke Friday night and I Poked him back, then he sent me another Poke and I haven’t heard from him since.  I have a feeling he went on holidays.  I thought I saw somewhere on his FB page that he was on holidays starting Saturday.  Which means he probably went away.  It really upsets me becos he didn’t even tell me!  He didn’t tell me he was going away, where or how long he will be away!  I know he doesn’t have to tell me but still, it would of been nice knowing!  WTF!!!  I keep checking Facebook like every 5 minutes checking to see if I got a Poke, a hug or a message or something from him!  

It’s not like we talked every day and I know he has lots of girls on his friends list that he has met through that group on FB.  I know becos I check it on their page.  I know he talks to these other girls so I know I am not the only one.  But I do think he does like me!  He likes my Status’s becos he does comment on them.  And we do send private messages which I know he likes!  I am just not sure how much he likes me and I wish I knew becos it is driving me crazy!

BUT, how do I know he isn’t sending Pokes and Cyber hugs to all of his other lady friends?  It sounds like he might be a bit of a player if you ask me.  You I just come right out and ask him how he feels about me?  Is it too early?  Should I wait awhile?

The thing is, my birthday is coming up in August, August 14th it is.  It would be so wonderful to go on a date with him on my birthday.  My birthday happens to fall on a Saturday too!  He would make my birthday perfect, I know he would! 

But like I said Ottawa is 5 hours away.  I don’t expect him to drive all that way to meet me and take me out for dinner spend $50.00 or more on gas and spend money on a nice dinner and then drive all the way back again!  How could I have him over to my place when I have never even met him before?  Everyone is telling me not to have him to my place until we meet a couple of times.  But I don’t think he would spend the money to stay at a hotel.  

What I really want to do is to cook him a nice romantic dinner.  J will be working.  I can picture him coming to the door with a bouquet of flowers introducing himself.  Of course the first thing I do is give him a great big hug!  I offer him a beer or a glass of wine and I poor myself a glass of wine.  we sit down on the couch beside each other and get to know each other.  The dinner is in the oven cooking and I get up to check on it every now and then.  Dinner is ready and I serve it and it is delicious!  The candles are lite on the table and soft music is playing.  He is enjoying his dinner and we chat all through dinner.  Dinner is over and we go back to the couch and we put a movie on.  Then we really start to get to know each other!  How does that sound for a first date?  Or perhaps he should take me out to a nice restaurant and then go back to my place for “dessert!” 

I don’t know, I guess I am dreaming as usual.  What do you guys think?  Anyway, my Status updates I write are to catch this guys attention and to hopefully make him jealous!  Like I said, he does comment on them sometimes and I am sure he is seeing all of Susan’s comments and everyone’s comments!  LMAO  And I really do think it is working. He loves it when my Status says “Prowlin’… “  It drives him crazy and really gets him going!  LOL  He will comment and then I will send him a private message and we will end up talk all evening.  Why the heck is it taking him so long to say “Pam, I want to meet you!”  I just want to say to him…  Is there any hope in meeting you some day?  What do you guys think?  What would you do?  What should I do?  Any comments would be greatly appreciated!

In the meantime, I have added a couple of other guys I met through this Are You Interested group and they seem like really nice guys!  I hope they also respond to my Status’s and hope that this will catch his attention and make him jealous!  That is the plan!  LOL  But right now I think John is away so my Status updates may be scarse until I know he has returned.  But I will still be there Prowlin’…!  LOL

Let me see, I had a great time in Florida!  We met some really nice people!  The weather was in the high 70’s and low 80’s so it was nice!  There were a couple of days it rained so we went shopping.  I didn’t buy much though.  I bought a bathing suit, a cover up top for my bathing suit and a t-shirt top.  Last year I bought alot of dressy tops for work but since I am not working right now I didn’t really need to buy anything.

Mostly we just relaxed by the pool everyday and did some major sun tanning!  I did get a really nice tan this year!  The people are so friendly at our motel.  We became quite friendly with the people 2 rooms down from us.  They were from Thunder Bay and they flew their two daughters down and there boyfriends so it was fun chatting with them all day long at the pool and on the beach!  We exchanged email addresses before we left.  It is nice to keep in touch with them! 

Mom’s friends didn’t come until the last week becos my mother’s friend’s mother was sick in the hospital but is much better so they came late and stayed later than us.  It was fun when they came down too. 

We went out to dinner a few times but mostly mom cooked.  We had our own little kitchen.  We went to the Shrimp Festival and we really enjoyed our meal.  I treated myself to a strawberry daiquiri.  I love it at the shrimp fest!  It is by the water and they have a marina and you can walk around and look at the boats!  It is very pretty!  They also have a really nice souvineer shop which is really fun to go in and look.  There is a live band which plays great music!

After the shrimp fest we drove to Ponce Inlet and walked out to the pier by the ocean.  It is also another pretty spot.  I took lots of pictures and posted them on Facebook incase you haven’t seen them yet.

Mom went walking on the beach every morning.  She walked up to 6 miles every day!  And when I say walking, it is like power walking!  Oh, how I wish I had her energy!  As you know, I have bad feet so I can’t really walk but I did go walking after dinner on the beach about a mile.  I can’t power walk so it is more like a stroll for me.  That is enough for me!  lol

We sure did meet alot of interesting people from all over.  And we saw our friends that play Botchi on the beach.  They were there last year and it was fun talking to them again!  They are retired and they go to the beach and play Botchi all afternoon.  I sure do wish I could do that!  lol

The 2nd last night we were there we went downtown and walked along the boardwalk.  My grandparents used to be “snowbirds.”  For 25 years they went every year to Daytona from the beginning of October to the end of April.  They rented a cottage type house right on the beach.  It was small but it was nice and cozy inside.  I remember it well.  I loved it, especially the stone fireplace.  It was gorgeous!

When I went to Florida a couple of years ago, Mom and I went to see the house and it had been torn down.  I was so upset!  There were a couple of houses owned by the same owner and they were torn down also but the main house still stands today!  I was able to take a couple of pictures of it from the road. 

We walked along the boardwalk and downtown for awhile.  It was a really nice night.  I took lots of pics and put them on Facebook for anyone who is interested.

It was really sad for me to leave.  I never want to leave!  I wish I could retire there some day.  I just love it there!  If only I could win the lottery!!!  Sigh…  How is everyone doing?  I miss blogging and I will try to post more often!

Then I thought I better make myself some lunch.  I’ve been into my weight watchers english muffins and bagels and I put peanut butter on it.  I felt a little better after I ate but not much. 

I have been feeling crappy all day.  It was so nice out so I opened the back door and I sat out for about 5 minutes sniffing the fresh air!  It was a beautiful spring day here today!  I get the sun in the backyard all afternoon so it was really warm!  I could of stayed out longer but I decided to go back in and do stuff.

I made us spaghetti for dinner and felt better after but I  feel very drained from my headache.  When it gets this bad nothing helps.  Not advil or aleve or anything. 

I think it is stress or it could be the weather.  I’m not so sure it is the weather becos I have actaully had a headache every day this week but today’s was the worst.  I just hope I feel beter tomorrow.   I am getting tired of these headaches.

J and I watched the Leafs game tonight.  We played against Tampa Bay Lighening and won in OT!!!  It was a good game and we seem to be playing alot better! 

Remember I mentioned that I belong to this group on Facebook called Are You Interested?  Well, awhile ago I was looking through all the guys and I found one I liked.  I clicked on him and sent him a wink.  He never responded and I sent him another wink.  Infact, I’m sure I must of sent him about 8 of them!  Finally, he sent me a Nudge back!  I went to send him a Nudge but it said that our conversation was blocked and that I would have to pay.  So I sent him a message sking him to please add me to his FB becos I wasn’t going to pay for the site.  I get a friend request from him almost right away!  I was really surprised!  Since he didn’t even know who I was, I didn’t think he would add me at all!  I don’t think I would of added him.

He seems to be a really nice guy!  We have sent a few private messages and he comments on my status’s!  But unfortunately, he doesn’t live near me.  He lives in Ontario but he is 5 hours away.  So I don’t think there is any hope for a relationship.  At least it is some one to talk too and he is really cute too! 

I sent a message to the other guy that lives in my town but he never responded so I’m not bothering with him anymore.  Also not a word from D which I am really upset about.  I haven’t even seen him sign on FB.  I am trying to control myself from sending him a message.  I don’t get it, he used to sign on all the time and now nothing, absolutely nothing!  I am so upset about this you have no idea!

Well, that’s about all my news.  I’m off to play Farmville and then go to bed.  By the way, I love getting Mystery gifts so can you please keep them coming!  I’m trying to fill up my farm!  Hope everyone is having a good week! 

I called a new agency expecting to make an appt. with them a couple of weeks ago but she said I have to do on line testing at home first.  I thought I would have to go in and meet with them first but that is not they way they work.  So the lady said she would email me the tests.  I waited and waited and she never did send me the tests.  I wasn’t in a real big hurry to do the tests so I didn’t call her right away.  Finally I did and she said “I sent you the tests.” I said “I never got it.”  She seemed actually quite bitchy, you can just tell.  So she sent it to me and I got it this time. 

On Wednesday afternoon I spent about 2 1/2 hours doing the testing.  I hate doing these tests but I was really glad to be doing in the comfort of my own home!  So I did the tests and I was really glad when it was all over with.  My neck and back were killing me and I ended up with a headache.  I always get so tense from these things.  LOL!

I called later that afternoon to find out how I did and she said I “Needed training” in Word Basic, Excel Basic Spelling, Grammar and Reception!  They rate…  “Needs Training, Basic, Intermediate and Advanced”  I said…  I have been a receptionist for years and you are telling me I need training!  LOLOL  She said “Yaaa.” like she was agreeing with me.  I wasn’t sure how I did in Word and Excel.   I pretty well know Word but I only know Basic Excel. 

So I asked if I could do the tests again and she emailed it to me right away.  I told her that I would do it the next day which I did.  It still took about the same amount of time but I knew I did better so I wasn’t too worried about it.

The next morning I called to find out how I did and I did much better!  She said I met expections in everything!  So I was quite pleased with myself!  She asked to book an appt to come in and meet with the people there and fully register.  I also have to watch a WHMIS video and do some testing on that but that is easy.  The whole thing will be about an hour and a half.  I booked an appt for this Monday afternoon. 

I am pretty excited about it.  I am hoping to get a good job and I really hope it becomes full time!  The only thing is my mother and I are going to Florida again this year in April so I have booked off the whole month of April with them.

My mother wants me to go the whole three weeks this year with her.  She wants me to help her drive back.  Since I am not working there is no real reason to come back early.  J will be fine on his own, I am not really worried about him.  J doesn’t really want me to go for all 3 weeks becos he will miss me too much, yes really he will!  But I have no choice becos my mother said she does not want to drive back alone.  I don’t really blame her.  And I don’t mind all that much becos I get three weeks in Florida!  I talk to J almost every day and his father is only 5 minutes down the street so he will be ok!

I wasn’t really excited about going to Florida as I have been in the past becos of my job situation.  I mean, I should be working but I don’t want to pass up going to Florida either.  Do you blame me? 

So I am starting to get ready for my trip.  I got my shorts out today and my bathing suit.  I know I have gained weight since last year so I tried my size 10 shorts on and they are really tight.  My size 12 shorts fit and same as my bathing suit.  I’m going to try real hard the next three weeks to diet.  I eat pretty well, I always have since I have been on weight watchers but I am just going to cut down my portions.  I am also going to do my sit ups every day and hope that helps.  I need to lose 15-20 lbs.

So wish me good luck tomorrow.  It will be interesting to see if they already have a placement for me and if they do I hope it is a good one!  I hope everyone had a good weekend! 

Last week J had a dentist appt. and an eye appt.  He needs new glasses and they should be ready next week.  He is using the same frame and it still is very expensive.  $279.00 just for lenses?  Thank goodness most of it is covered and it will go under his father’s insurance.

What’s new with me?  Nothing really.  I sent D an ECard on Valentine’s Day.  I know he viewed it becos I got the notification saying that he picked it up on VDay evening.  I haven’t heard a word from him.  He never even sent me an email saying Thank you or a message on Facebook!  I am so upset about this you have no idea but I guess it doesn’t surprise me.

It is D’s birthday tomorrow.  I was going to send him happy birthday ECard or send him a message wishing him a happy birthday on Facebook but I have decided not too.  Not hearing from him and not even seeing him on Facebook for about 3 weeks has hurt me enough.  You have no idea how upset I am that I am not there at the office on Monday to wish him a happy birthday.  I know I will just have to deal with it.

I am trying very hard to forget about D and it isn’t easy!  There is a group on Facebook called Are You Interested, I joined it months ago.  I like to look at all the guys pictures and profiles. 

Awhile ago, I got a wink from a guy that lives right here in my town and not too far from me actually!  I looked at his profile and saw that in one of the pictures he was wearing a Toronto Maple Leafs  jersey.  My profile says…   Single and looking for a nice guy to share my life with.  If you are a Toronto Maple Leafs fan it would be a big bonus!  That’s it!

So I ignored his first wink and one day last week (Wednesday) I was browsing through profiles and on the right hand side there were potential matches.  His picture came up!  So I clicked on it and I said to myself “Oh, I remember you!”  Not an hour later I got a wink from him!  If you pay for the site you get to see who previews you.  I won’t pay extra for it.

Anyway, after really thinking about it and saying…  What do I have to lose, I got up enough nerve to send him a wink back.  He sent me back another wink and we have been chatting everyday since.  Mostly about the Leafs and hockey of course!  I am not saying we are going to end up meeting or even dating.  It’s way too early to tell.  But it is nice being able to talk to someone.  It is something to look forward too.  At least this guy talks to me, D won’t.  D is such a Chicken Shit!

I guess that’s all my news.  Tomorrow will be the usual cleaning day.  J is going out with his friend to a wrestling show so there will be no dinner at my mothers tomorrow night.  Besides I want to stay home and watch the game.  It will be very exiting!  Hope everyone is having a good weekend!

On the way home I picked up a few groceries.  J has Wednesdays off school so he scheduled himself to work at McDonalds.  So later on in the afternoon I drove him to work and came home.  I made myself a cup of tea and watched on show General Hospital.  Later on I had dinner and watched American Idol.  Then I had to go and pick up J. 

On Sunday my friend Jane (from work) and I went to our friends daughter birthday party.  Her little girl just turned 1 years old.  She is such a cutie patootie!  She is so adorable and so well behaved!  There were alot of people and alot of food and we had a good time!  It was fun watching Mom open all her gifts, of course the birthday girl was trying to help!

Tomorrow I have an appt with my skin specialist.  I have two big skin tags on my upper thighs which I want removed.  They started out very small and have grown and they are pretty big so I want them removed.  I hope it doesn’t cost much and I hope he removes them tomorrow.  I don’t want to have to go back.

We still don’t have any snow here yet.  This is been unreal for the month of January but I think we are suppose to get 2 to 4 cm’s tomorrow.  Let’s see if that happens.

So I have been trying to figure out my bank account.  I’m going to be getting back some money back from my insurance for my feet (I see a chiropodas every 6 weeks and I claim it) and that just about pays for 1/2 of it plus I got my gst cheque this month.  So we went out and bought one on Saturday!  I got the 8 gig which  is all I really need anyway. 

I have been playing with it ever since and I absolutely love it!!!  J has been helping me with it.  When I’m not sitting at the computer, I have my IPod with me.  The first thing I did was put Facebook on it!  I love being able to see who is on line.  I especially can’t miss seeing if D is on line!  LOL!  Yes, I am addicted to Facebook!

J worked Saturday night and since there wasn’t a Leafs game on I watched the Toronto Maple Leafs vs Montreal Canadians 1967 stanley cup game.  The last time the Leafs won the stanley cup!  It was an amazing game!  I was thinking of my Dad the whole game becos he was there!  I wish I knew where he was sitting.  I’m going to ask my aunt if she knows then I will watch the game again and see if I can see him in the stands.  it’s in black and white and it is hard to tell but you never know.

Like I said it was an amazing game and I really love watching the old classic games.  I guess becos it reminds me of my Dad and I feel so close to him.  I was also thinking of D becos he is a Montreal fan and I know he would love to see the game.  I messaged D to tell him about it and I am anxious to hear what he has to say.

On Sunday my ex came over and he helped me put up a couple of pictures around the house.  One of which is my picture the one of the Special Tree.  I finally have it put up in the living room.  I am so proud of that picture becos I took it myself for my step father but unfortunately he never saw it becos he died a couple of days later.  I don’t know what took me so long to put it up!  I guess I just never got around to it.

My ex also had a talk with J.  He was asking him about school.  We had an appt. last Friday.  J didn’t do very well the first semester and they are letting J start the the whole semester over again.  We are going to get him on the applied program so he will get extra help.  He actually has an appt tomorrow morning with them.  J’s dad had a long talk with him telling him how important it is to study.  His father is paying for his course which I am very grateful for and so is J.  J is determined to do better and study more and hopefully he will do better this semester.

I had a dentist appt this afternoon.  I have been neglecting my teeth.  I know I am bad.  I thought I better take advantage of it while I still have benefits.  It was for a regualr cleaning but my tea are stained from drinking tea so it required alot of cleaning on the hygenists part.  She only did the bottom teeth and they are soar now.  I have to go back next Monday as well to do the top teeth.  Then I will be all shiney and clean!

Well, it’s late and I’m off to bed.  I hope everyone has a good week! 

I was laid off work on December 2nd!  Yes, you read that right.  I lost my job!  The company that I worked for was out sourcing our data entry group to India.  Can you believe that?  We new it was happening just not that fast.  They let me and my friend go and another lady who was a temp but she just became full time.  2 more girls have been told they are staying until the end of February and after that they are gone.  There will be no more data entry group at all.  Pretty sad isn’t it?  I’ve been there for 9 years and I’m gone!  I can’t believe they let me, a single mother go 3 weeks before Christmas!  It was quite a shock and everyone was crying!  Even our accounting manager was crying and she usually is a bitch! 

My friend and I cleared out our desks and we said our goodbye’s and there were lots of tears and hugs!  My friend invted me back to her house for lunch as this just happened before 12 noon.  I said “No thanks, I think I will go home and cry.”  My ex boss said “Pam, go to Jane’s and have a glass of wine.”  I said “OK.”  So after a nice lunch and whole bottle of wine later!  LOL!  We had a good cry and a few laughs.  One of the girls came over after work to see how we were doing.  We were happy she came by, it was so nice of her to give us support.

So of course this meant no Christmas party which I was so looking forward to.  I was so upset about missing the Christms party you have no idea!  And you no what this means?  There will be no more D stories to write about!  I didn’t say goodbye to him when this happened becos I was so upset and I didn’t want him to see me crying.  I wonder what he thinks of all of this?  I wonder if he misses me?  I miss him so much it is killing me!

Luckily I was given a severance package.  I am being paid until July, 2010 which I am very grateful for!  If I didn’t have that, I would have to sell my house right away and who knows where we would live!  Yes, I am very worried and scared about finding another job.  There isn’t much out there at all.  I am praying the market will pick up in the next couple of months.

I applied at a temp agency.  My ex-husband actually gave me a lady’s name at this temp agency.  She got my ex’s brother’s wife a good government job here in town.  I called her yesterday and she emailed me a link to fill out a form on line which I did.  I met her on January 5th and I had to fill out more forms and she asked me questions.  We talked for awhile and I asked about the government job.  She said they are one of there biggest clients and I said I would love to get in there so hopefully something will come up soon.  She said January and February are slow months and it should pick up again in March.  Hopefully something will come up and soon!

Of course losing my job sure put a bit of a damper on Christmas this year but I tried not to let losing my job ruin my Christmas.  We had a very nice Christmas!  J enjoyed his gifts very much as did I!  We were spoiled as usual.  I put some of the pictures up on Facebook so you will be able to see them there.

We had a quiet New Years as well.  Every year we watch Dick’s ball drop!  (snicker, snicker)  LOL!  I poured myself a glass of wine just before midnight and we waited for Dick’s ball to drop.  Earlier we watched the hockey game World Juniors Canada team.  It was quiet but fun!

I have been busy lately cleaning and organizing my house.  It doesn’t look like I have done much but really I have.  There is still alot more I want to get done before I go back to work.

For those of you who are interested I have been keeping in touch with D through Facebook.  Just before Christmas I got up enough nerve to start chatting with him.  I just said “Hey D, how are you.  Just wanted to say Hi.”  There was nothing for a minute or two and so I started to get upset thinking he isn’t going to respond but he did!  He said “Hey, you surprised me.  I didn’t know Facebook had this feature.”  I told him you can chat with anyone on your friends list.  Of course I am the only one on his friends list other than the sailing group he belongs too.

Anyway we chatted for a bit.  He asked  me how I was doing and he asked me what I was doing for Christmas.  He said he was looking forward to having a few days off.  I said to him “I guess you are going to your sisters or just hanging around the house?”  He said “A bit of both.”  Then all of a sudden he said “Sorry, I’ve gotta go.  I will look for you again.”  That made me happy when he said that but why did he have to go in such a hurry?  It was only 10:30 at night!  Oh well, at least he was talking to me!

Then a couple of days before Christmas I sent him a private message wishing him a merry Christmas and a happy and healthy New year.  I said It would be nice to see you again.  Maybe we could go for lunch?  He didn’t answer and I was getting pretty upset I wasn’t hearing from him. 

I even asked one of the girls I used to work with if he was there.  They told me he wasn’t there!  Finally he was back to work on Wednesday.  Then Thursday night he finally answered my message!  he told me he was away for the holidays and he wished me a Happy New Year!  Was I ever on Cloud 99!  So then I wrote him back and asked him where he went!  He wrote me back yesterday telling me he drove down to Texas with his BIL and saw a couple of Football games.  He said it was alot of driving but it was fun!

That’s all he said.  I don’t know if he was here for New Years or not but I don’t think he was.  I am going to wait a couple of days before I answer him back and I will ask him a question to get him to write me back!  Hopefully he will.

But notice how he never mentioned lunch?  I am sure he will never ask me and I guess he doesn’t like chatting becos it makes him uncomfortable.  So I think he only likes to send private messages.  If this is the only way he will keep in touch then I guess it will have to do.  At least I am hearing from him but I am quite certain I will never see him again.  This makes me very upset!    And to make matters worse.  I don’t think he really even cares if he sees me again or not.  So I am sure whatever friendship we did or do have will die eventually.

Anyway, that about keeps everyone up to date.  Wish me luck on the job front and the D front.  I would really appreciate it!  I hope everyone had a great holiday and I hope 2010 is a wonderul year for you and your family!    And I promise I will try to be a better blogger!